leadership

It begins with Confidence and a Friendly nature. Add Willingness... and you end up in student government and a team captain. A lot of unpaid time, but rarely stressful. 'Popularity' is a nice by-product.

Then it advances... you are Organized and Committed to seeing things through. You Finish that which is laid before you, which is so uncommon that you end up with a title and more unpaid time.

Eventually you notice people are always waiting on you to make Decisions.

"I don't know any more about this than you"

"I don't know what to do"

But it doesn't matter. They wait on you anyway.

Stress arrives in full-force, and your Level-Head continues, whatever the work is. Everything is expanding, and the challenges faced regard New Territories. Confidence comes forward, and onward we go.

Who knew going into all of this how much you can be stretched? Character becomes a centroid, an exhausting reality. Character is never satisfied with itself.

Enter dark times. Bigger than me. Bigger than anything I can grasp, control, or understand. Leadership at a level previously untested is required.

It begins with a willingness to help

Then a willingness to make decisions

to finish the tasks

to search out answers in a new world

to deal with yourself and your faults

Here I am making decisions that hurt some to protect others.

Heavy

Walking forward without joy

Stretched and thin and frail

Amazed at how life just keeps coming at me..

Duplicity

God has said, 'You shall not eat from it or touch it, lest you die'... the serpent said to the woman 'You surely shall not die!'... all the days that Adam lived were nine hundred and thirty years, and he died.
Genesis 3:3-4; 5:3-5

God told Adam he would die if he acted according to the serpent. But Adam fell curious about experiences beyond his Creator/Sustainer and trusted that he would continue to live: 'Surely if I touch and ate of this simple fruit I will not cease to be... such is irrational'. And you know, the serpent was correct; Adam's disobedience turned out not that big of a deal as he piles on another 800 years enjoying creation, fat and happy.

"This... bread..., one may eat of it and not die... if anyone shall eat of this bread, he shall live forever.'
John 6:50-51

Every person Jesus was speaking to here died. As far as we know, none of them extended their days beyond standard expectations. Ironically, those who chose to eat Jesus' bread failed to match the 800 years which the 'Surely you'll die' Adam enjoyed. Jesus was incorrect; the disciples were fooled... they ate of His bread oand did not live to see the fall of Jerusalem.
God has it backwards in both of these passages: He predicts death but allows life; He promises life but watches death overtake.
That is, unless life as God creates and defines is more than the blood flowing through our veins, neurons firing within our cranium. If by faith we believe that Jehovah Father and Jesus Son knew what they were speaking of regarding the death and life of 'life', we must search out what it is they understand of their creation.
We naturally estimate existence beyond matter... somehow beyond what we ourselves see and feel. Those who deny this seem to do so at great effort on their part, insisting such a belief and then finding a means to its end.

Unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink His blood, you have no life in yourself.
John 6:53
If by the transgression of the one, death reigned through the one, much more those who received the abundance of grace and of the gift of righteousness will reign in life through the one, Jesus [the] Christ.
Romans 5:17

These claims are a-rational and ridiculous. However, they are at the root of the greatest single force in history. Life is duplicitous; there is some part of us both physical and not. There are answered and unanswered questions about what it is within us that is not physical... answers we have spent history searching, only to begin anew with the passing of generation to generation. We may have clean skin, fresh breath and pure lungs, yet be found an apostate. We may walk the land in frailty and leprosy, yet be sought out as a living saint.

Let us acknowledge the fullness of life in both the physical and spiritual, seek harmony with our Maker and look to His Spirit, His words and fellow saints for guidance to do so.

Alan needs...

The inspiration for this post comes from a friend I like to call Erik Amick, who has shown me the limitless value of Facebook and wasted time. What follows are the top eight (8) needs of Alan, according to Google (just type in "Alan needs"):

1. Alan needs a Johnny: there are very few places this could go and stay out of the gutter


2. Alan needs a new pair of short: what are you, my mom?!


3. Alan needs friends: that's where you're wrong. I am a Rock, I am an Island.


4. Alan needs a jelly mould: now finally, Google got one right.


5. Alan needs a DLL guru: sounds like I might get hurt.


6. Alan needs to cut 7 players from his girls High School volleyball team by tonight: easier done than written. Crybabies.


7. Alan needs to ditch the corny pictures on the album artwork and on his site: I'm never going to get taken seriously by others if I don't take myself seriously.


8. Alan needs parents for patty-cake: I miss that game.

stuff on my mind

1. from Donnie Hoover, my college pastor:
• "A True Leader models before men that which they desire of them".
2. The things that break God's heart ought to break ours:
• a neighbor's loneliness;
• a child who doesn't know what it is like to be a child;
• bitterness;
3. We are not trustworthy; God is. We do not need to spend our efforts and concern our lives with whether or not the person we are dealing with is trustworthy... because they are not. Do not rely on their trustworthiness, but rather on God's. By faith (and not by sight), He takes care of us.
4. We know grace because we have received it. Grace does not originate within ourselves, but is a learned behavior. The presence of God is found in the extension of grace to others. Forgiveness is the calling card of Jehovah God, and the mark of His children.

155 day Election prophecy

This isn't at all political... just some rudimentary analysis of trends:
In the last four elections (1992-2004):

• 36 of 51 states (incl. D.C.) voted completely consistent from '92 - '04 election to election... either voting four times for Democrats or for Republicans;
• these 36 states account for 244 electoral votes for Democrats (18 states + D.C.) and 148 electoral votes for Republicans (17 states), providing a pretty solid starting base for each party going into a national election;
• by law, a candidate needs 270 electoral votes to win the election;
• therefore, if we make the initial assumption that these 36 states will continue their voting trends over the last 20 years, the democratic candidate for President will need 26 electoral votes or the republican candidate for President will need 122 electoral votes to win the election.
• these votes are coming from 15 states, with 146 electoral votes (state, # of electoral votes, and the last four election results):
• Arizona (10) (3R, 1D)
• Arkansas (10) (2 R, 2D)
• Colorado (9) (3R, 1D)
• Florida (27) (3R, 1D)
• Iowa (7) (1R, 3D)
• * Kentucky (8) (2R, 2D)
• * Louisiana (11) (2R, 2D)
• * Missouri (11) (2R, 2D)
• Montana (3) (3R, 1D)
• * Nevada (5) (2R, 2D)
• New Hampshire (4) (1R, 3D)
• New Mexico (5) (1D, 3R)
• * Ohio (20) (2R, 2D)
• * Tennessee (11) (2R, 2D)
• * West Virginia (5) (2R, 2D)

* These six states have correctly voted for the election winner in each of the four elections. They are batting 1.000.

• there are a couple of points in the above that are make their outcome in this '08 election pretty easy to predict:
• Arkansas and Tennessee were carried by the home-state Clinton/Gore tickets of '92 & '96, but were handily won by Republicans in '00 & '04. It is likely they will go Republican;
• Montana's single Democrat vote was in '92, but has continuously trended more Republican in each subsequent election;
• New Hampshire went all 1792 on us in the '00, but won't be found making that diversion of character again - pretty easy to bet Democrat here;
• a revised likely projection of the electoral votes without either candidate spending a dime on spin after accounting for the first 40 states (the 36 original and the 4 above) has the Democratic candidate for President needing 22 electoral votes or the Republican candidate for President needing 99 electoral votes to win the election.

For the final 11 states, I must say that things are looking pretty good for Obama... if he picks up Florida and sleeps through the rest of the campaign, it would look like a pretty reasonable win. Before we write McCain off however, I need to mention that the Republican candidate won 9 of these 11 states the last two elections (including "my precious", Florida). Six of these states (AZ, FL, KY, LA, MO, WV) have grown consistently more Republican in their voting over the past four elections (including Florida), giving the Republican candidate a strong shot at their 67 electoral votes. 
Result: there is a large lead for any Democratic candidate in 'guaranteed' electoral votes, but the 11 swing states have favored the Red Elephant in recent years. With Florida and Ohio carrying 47 total electoral votes and the remaining nine states carrying 77 (of which 40 are trending Republican), these two states will be the battleground of the election. If a single candidate wins both of these states, they will certainly win the election. If they lose them, there is almost no chance of them winning the election. If they split (which hasn't happened since '92), the college will implode and we'll play King of the Hill to see who will lead us.

Conclusion:

• McCain will cover the spread on his initial 17 states and 123 electoral votes,
• He will take care of the three anomaly states and their 24 electoral votes,
• He will carry the six Republican trending swing states (including Florida) and their 67 electoral votes,
• He'll pick up his three western neighbor swing states (CO, NM, NV) and their 19 electoral votes,
• He will lose the tenth swing state (IA) because eventually luck runs out,
• and His realistic understanding of the globalization of the world manufacturing economy will be exploited by the Obama campaign to the effect of Ohio and its 20 electoral votes being won by the Democrat;
• McCain: 29 states, 263 electoral votes;
• Obama: 21 states (and D.C.), 275 electoral votes.

Dwell in the comprehension that another loves you? Lie in that place of rest? Need to have an understanding of what love is, love defined to a depth wherein serenity lies.

God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.Romans 5:8

The words of love are unfulfilling: they may excite the ears and calm the nerves, but you will not rest long with them. They are empty bedfellows.

We know love by this, that He laid down His life for us;
1 John 3:16a

Love is comprehended through mutual experience. For one to remain faithful, to continue to care for you even as they witness, experience and suffer as a result of they reality of who you are (and are not), in these times the comprehension of what love is is birthed, established, accepted, settled into, and poured over our heads with peace.
And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:8
To be able to rest, to sleep deeply, to be a bit careless in your life... you must be loved unconditionally by someone truly trustworthy. To learn what it is to love, we must be loved in this defining manner.

He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters. He restores my soul;
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil; for Thou art with me;
Psalm 23:2,3,4

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Garrett is in a very different spot than Emily, Louise and Elizabeth. Maggie is 'Mama' and I am 'Daddy', but while those are deeply ingrained and comforting roles and words and people to Emily, Louise and Elizabeth, they are just names of two tall people who are generally nice to him. Garrett has not the experience with either of us to rest fully in our presence. He does not yet know what love is.
So every day, as he causes and finds and gets into the trouble of being a two-year-old, he is suffering in the fear and anguish of in-experience... he does not know what love is. I can whisper those cliched words over him ("I love you"); none of it will settle over him until time and experience reveals love to him.

There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love. We love, because He first loved us.1 John 4:18-19

As a parent for seven years, I have not really thought this responsibility. I understand how folks struggle with God's love because they do not know His definition, have not experienced and therefore been taught what love is. It is an emotional risk to give and receive this love. I am commissioned to bring Gods' love into Garrett's life, into all of my children's lives. It hurts to watch him not rest in my love. God must suffer as sees most of his creation not rest in Him. As we have been home these three months with Garrett, I believe I have learned a bit of this suffering.

Be gracious to me, O God, according to Thy lovingkindness;
Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.
Purify me with hyssop, and I shall be clean;
Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.
Psalm 51: 1,2,7

where is Thy Victory?

In my sophomore year at Tech, a friend of my friends was killed in a hunting accident - freak of nature, no one to hold blame. He was 20ish and a leader within the Jesus community. His funeral was uncommon... a time of worship and healing not bound by the physical arena in which we gathered. 12+ years ago, and I am still there.

O Death, where is your victory? O Sheol, where is your sting? - Hosea 13:14

Church is nice, generally. Stick around long enough and you'll find pretty good reasons to complain; but it is generally worth it. Folks seem to like having their kids there at least, even if they mind going themselves. After enough time and you can identify yourself as a christian: congratulations.

You can baptize, commune, give, offer, sacrifice... pick a faith and take a chance with it. We preach that sincerity is more important than the substance of your faith; as long as you meant to believe something good, you should be in shape for the next step.

And then let Death introduce himself. Not quickly, where pride and courage and adrenaline create an exoskeleton defense of your soul. Let Death come slowly, over months, with pain and numbness and lack of control, with people poking and prodding and praying and laying hands on you... with Death not stopping his advance.

He will win; you will die. Your flesh will be emptied and the who of who you are will change; it is going somewhere else... or is it? Your creed and tradition and hope may point your mind to a "belief". But a metaphysical intervention is required to face Death with hope. Our beliefs are pleasant, but they do not create redemption, nor do they overcome the world outside of us. Victory over Death does not come from within. We will all meet and be overtaken by Death... all of us. We are not capable of survival... we don't even understand what we are battling.

Litmus Tests:
Peace in the face of Death. Do you know the presence of God and rest in His care, not merely resolved to face Death with 'dignity'? This is a gift from beyond our selves, from beyond rational comprehension.
Joy in the grip of Death. This is ludicrous, and counters the instinct of the cells that intertwine to form us. The look forward to what is next, in a trust that the One is there, where you are going, and He cares for you, and will take care of you.

... we cry out, "Abba! Father!" - Romans 8:15

Sunday school and scripture memory and church attendance and gray hairs... an open mind and educated background, the words and works of those come before us... none of these birth Joy. It is a gift handed, poured over your head from One who knows and understands and gives Victory over Death.

He will swallow up death for all time, and the Lord YHWH will wipe tears away from all faces. - Isaiah 25:8

thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ... therefore, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your toil is not in vain. - II Corinthians 15:57-58

Not necessarily worried about what comes next, but rather how you face Death when he knocks: in the now, you can pretend... you can not worry about it, put it out of your mind. Lord knows it isn't a pleasant subject. And then you can hope that when your 'time comes', it is quick and you won't be given much time to think about it. You can put hope in your 'beliefs' and whatever direction they provide for you. I have never witnessed someone facing Death at peace and with joy from their beliefs; I'm skeptical of our power to prepare for Death. But I have witnessed Jesus reaching down with His peace and joy and calming one's soul down and readying His brother to come home.

	John McCain Score: 27	Agree Taxes Stem-Cell Research Abortion Social Security Line-Item Veto Energy Marriage Death Penalty Education	Disagree Iraq Immigration Health Care Gun Control Environment
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